I had another milestone this year. I have been part of the AARP set for a while but there have been those milestone birthdays that you always seem to impress upon you certain stages of your life. When I was 18 and free of home, when I was 35 and now felt like an adult with a career instead of just a job, and 60 when I realized that I still feel 35. Oh I don't mean physically, I mean mentally as in I think I am still able to do what a 35 year old can do. Now, do I want to be that age again? Never! Do I want to go through the trials and tribulations of a single Mom working two jobs to support us? No! Do I want to deal with roommates and moving and dating and raising a child alone? Hell No! But I still think that I have the same zest for life, with more experience. I still have the same enthusiasum and verve that I had then, maybe more because I have the time to do those things that I didn't have before. Then, I was happy to get a full nights sleep.
So, the journey that started at birth, has taken me through many twists and turns. Meeting many amazing people who have shown me mountains of lessons many I am sure I have forgotten over the years, but some have stayed with me.
1. Like never try to shower when you are too drunk to stand up.
2. Never go to the California Rodeo without your own car to come home in. (Or drink Gin!)
3. Always listen to your instincts when it comes to dates.
4. Keep a twenty dollar bill in your wallet at all times.
5. Follow your heart in both work and love.
6. Keep your secrets to yourself, the moment you tell anyone, it is no longer a secret. Even if they tell noone.
7. Find that core of friends that you can trust with your life and keep in touch with them all of your life. (Usually you can count them on one hand)
8. Find something you absolutely love doing, and don't give it up. Not for anyone.
9. Find yourself first, be happy with yourself, and then find someone to love. It works better that way.
10. Adopt a pet of your choice at least once in your life. It will change you in so many ways.
11. Show your children that they are the most important thing in your life every day they are with you, because they will leave sooner than you think. (It feels like a blink of an eye)
12. Don't ever put a job before your children.
13. Make sure that you are taking care of yourself everyday and you will be a better parent and spouse/friend/person/worker. if you don't you won't be good for anyone.
14. Work out old wounds and put them in the past. Not letting go just makes more negativity for the future. The physics rule, for every action there is an equal and oposite reaction is very true. So the more good energy the better you get back.
15. Growing up and growing old is not the same. We can be adults but still be young enough to enjoy all that life has to offer at any age.
16. Find the wonder and beauty in every day.
17. If you can't get away from home take a mental vacation by reading a book or watching your favorite movie.
18. Find the positive in everything. (I know, this is the hard one for me to do all the time, but I try!)
19. Forgive yourself and others.
20. Have faith that things will work out. (Why not? It can't hurt.)
So that's the first 20 I thought of. I have to say they were not in any order. It is the journey not the destination and I keep coming back to that. I am on this road that I have set for myself and I keep moving, I just know I have many more lessons to learn and many more sights to see. If any of you have things to add to this list I would love to hear about them. Let meknow.
Travel on! Coy
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
Friday, September 2, 2011
Just a moment in time....
Tonight I walked outside to call the dogs in from my second story deck and although the banked fog way out there had taken away what could have been a spectacular sunset, I found that subtle change of color that always fascinates me at the end and beginning of day. The inky blue-black of night was falling fast but there was a few bands of lighter blue turning to pink and then orange and then the incredible red that painters have trouble capturing. The fog that banked out at the horizon then turned it into a murky tomato red that then dropped into an undulating steel gray sea with pearlized waves.
When I looked back up at the trees that I grouse about that block my view of the ocean on two thirds of my deck I noticed that the bands of light were shining through the boughs of the trees and making a puzzle of color that was priceless, then as I scanned the rest of the clear sky (something that we cherish here in the Northwest!) I saw that the crescent moon was just over the tops of those trees, making it a picture perfect moment in time as I stood there listening to the dogs in the neighbor hood talk about how the cats were bothering them again or how the weekend vacation dogs needed to mellow out for the Labor Day weekend. But at just a moment in time, all was right in the world.
I try to capture that moment every time I take a picture at the beach of the sunset or try to keep a picture that I didn't take in my head for a time to be able to write about it. So instead of inserting one of the many, many, many times I have tried to capture the sunset, I will let you picture it for yourself. Close your eyes and picture the perfect sunset without the sun in it.
Then see how relaxed you are. I sure am.
Have a great Labor Day weekend and stay safe.
When I looked back up at the trees that I grouse about that block my view of the ocean on two thirds of my deck I noticed that the bands of light were shining through the boughs of the trees and making a puzzle of color that was priceless, then as I scanned the rest of the clear sky (something that we cherish here in the Northwest!) I saw that the crescent moon was just over the tops of those trees, making it a picture perfect moment in time as I stood there listening to the dogs in the neighbor hood talk about how the cats were bothering them again or how the weekend vacation dogs needed to mellow out for the Labor Day weekend. But at just a moment in time, all was right in the world.
I try to capture that moment every time I take a picture at the beach of the sunset or try to keep a picture that I didn't take in my head for a time to be able to write about it. So instead of inserting one of the many, many, many times I have tried to capture the sunset, I will let you picture it for yourself. Close your eyes and picture the perfect sunset without the sun in it.
Then see how relaxed you are. I sure am.
Have a great Labor Day weekend and stay safe.
Thursday, September 1, 2011
Coming and going
When I lived in the Bay Area with all the bridges everywhere I learned to drive going through the Caldecott tunnel being rewarded with a usually beautiful view of the San Francisco Bay when you come out of it. Lake Temesacal is off to the left where I spent many afternoons my senior year cutting my last two classes and with my friends Sue, Karen, Christine or a few others we would feel so adult like being on our own. But we would drive around the Berkeley hills getting lost and then finding our way home again in time not to get caught.
I used to try to find back ways to places that I would go so that I would know where other streets went so I wouldn't have to come back the same way I came. I always loved the different scenery of an alternate route if I had time. Of course there is never time you say on your way to work. Or in my case right now, when everything is on Highway 101.
But a couple of days ago I had to go to Corvallis. It is about a hour and a half to two hour drive from me. There are two ways to go to get there. And the first time I went, I took the same route both ways as I was pushed for time. This time, well now that I am unemployed, I have all my days open, so, I decided to take the other way home.
It was another wooded beautiful drive as are most of them here in Oregon. There are all these beautiful green pines and steams and deep green wooded areas that invite you to stop and make you want to take a walk in them. They are dotted with rustic houses and yards filled with flowers as if they just can't help themselves from growing bigger than life. The Rhodedendrons are blooming everywhere so there are huge bushes of color around every turn.
It had started out cloudy but had turned into a beautiful sunny day and I had the sunroof open as I was cruising down the highway with Little Big Town playing full force, singing away. As I came upon some road work, there was a construction worker standining with his stop/slow sign. He was a round man probably in his late fifties, with a huge full salt and pepper beard and mustache and his hard hat. I was first to be stopped while they allowed the other side to come through. The tune Little White Church came on and to my surprise, he started singing the song and stomping his foot to the beat. It lasted for the whole song while the cars went by. Just as it ended he stopped, and turned the sign then did a very gentlemanly bow stretching out his hand in the direction for me to go. I saluted my partner in song laughing as I looked in the rear view mirror to see the person in the pickup behind me clapping for our host. It was a little three minute interlude on a highway I normally wouldn't have taken. But it will stick in my mind as a great ending to the day.
He could have stood there as so many do, and done nothing. It would have been another part of the day to the rest of us. But he had a good time, from an otherwise annoying situation to most people who had to stop. He made at least two of us enjoy the stop and have a good memory of that road and that trip.
Some people just have a knack for doing that.
I know as a woman it is scary to be out there and reach out to people we don't know. There are so many bad things that can happen, but I have always found that if you trust your instincts, you know that reaching out in small ways and talking to people and showing small gestures when you are out traveling that it is so much more satisfying than not to you in the long run. It is no telling who you might meet and what you might learn.
My friend Nancy used to say Hi to everyone we would pass when we were hiking in Yosemite or Tahoe, or on the Beach. She taught me that it is a good thing to do and I drive Cal crazy by doing it when we go on trips. I ask locals questions without thought of what they might think of me. Call me crazy but who else would know about the area I am visiting than the locals? And they tell you some extraordinary things at times!
So next time you get the chance, take a different way home and see what you find. Who knows you may meet my singing construction guy? You may find that perfect photo, but it is always good to stretch those wings and see something new.
Travel on.
I used to try to find back ways to places that I would go so that I would know where other streets went so I wouldn't have to come back the same way I came. I always loved the different scenery of an alternate route if I had time. Of course there is never time you say on your way to work. Or in my case right now, when everything is on Highway 101.
But a couple of days ago I had to go to Corvallis. It is about a hour and a half to two hour drive from me. There are two ways to go to get there. And the first time I went, I took the same route both ways as I was pushed for time. This time, well now that I am unemployed, I have all my days open, so, I decided to take the other way home.
It was another wooded beautiful drive as are most of them here in Oregon. There are all these beautiful green pines and steams and deep green wooded areas that invite you to stop and make you want to take a walk in them. They are dotted with rustic houses and yards filled with flowers as if they just can't help themselves from growing bigger than life. The Rhodedendrons are blooming everywhere so there are huge bushes of color around every turn.
It had started out cloudy but had turned into a beautiful sunny day and I had the sunroof open as I was cruising down the highway with Little Big Town playing full force, singing away. As I came upon some road work, there was a construction worker standining with his stop/slow sign. He was a round man probably in his late fifties, with a huge full salt and pepper beard and mustache and his hard hat. I was first to be stopped while they allowed the other side to come through. The tune Little White Church came on and to my surprise, he started singing the song and stomping his foot to the beat. It lasted for the whole song while the cars went by. Just as it ended he stopped, and turned the sign then did a very gentlemanly bow stretching out his hand in the direction for me to go. I saluted my partner in song laughing as I looked in the rear view mirror to see the person in the pickup behind me clapping for our host. It was a little three minute interlude on a highway I normally wouldn't have taken. But it will stick in my mind as a great ending to the day.
He could have stood there as so many do, and done nothing. It would have been another part of the day to the rest of us. But he had a good time, from an otherwise annoying situation to most people who had to stop. He made at least two of us enjoy the stop and have a good memory of that road and that trip.
Some people just have a knack for doing that.
I know as a woman it is scary to be out there and reach out to people we don't know. There are so many bad things that can happen, but I have always found that if you trust your instincts, you know that reaching out in small ways and talking to people and showing small gestures when you are out traveling that it is so much more satisfying than not to you in the long run. It is no telling who you might meet and what you might learn.
My friend Nancy used to say Hi to everyone we would pass when we were hiking in Yosemite or Tahoe, or on the Beach. She taught me that it is a good thing to do and I drive Cal crazy by doing it when we go on trips. I ask locals questions without thought of what they might think of me. Call me crazy but who else would know about the area I am visiting than the locals? And they tell you some extraordinary things at times!
So next time you get the chance, take a different way home and see what you find. Who knows you may meet my singing construction guy? You may find that perfect photo, but it is always good to stretch those wings and see something new.
Travel on.
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