I know most women don't think of traveling alone, or even want to. They go with family or friends, or their lovers or mates. And I know that it is much less stressful or scary to go with someone else. It is more fun to share the adventure you are on with someone you can relate to. But some (probably most) women in their late 40's and up still feel uncomfortable going to a restaurant alone, or seeing the sights somewhere all by themselves. I have been privililged to know a few very strong and brave and intelligent women who felt the need to do independent things. Like do a walk about in Austrailia for 3 months. Or drive across the US by themselves to see the National Parks before going back to college. Yes, I am sure they were all warned about the hazards, and knew that they could be a victim at any point in time, but they still reached out to grab life by the scruff of the neck and run with it. They had good examples in history. Amelia Earhart for one. There are so many others.
I took a trip down the coast of California for a week once. I decided to go see the coast and have no real plan of attack for the week. I had friends I hadn't seen for a while that I would stop to see but I could wander down the coast and stay where I wanted,when I wanted and as long as I didn't max out my only credit card at the time, I would be able to enjoy a week of sun and surf.
It was in the early 80's and I was enjoying having a week of free time so I started in Santa Cruz. I stayed at the Dream Inn which at that time was a great hotel right on the beach at the end of the boardwalk. I spent three nights there as I met some younger people and ended up having a great time with them at the boardwalk and in Aptos. We enjoyed dinner at the Shadowbrook Inn the last night I was there which I would not have found on my own. They were all so much younger than I but it goes to show you that you can learn something from any age.
The drive down Highway 1 between Santa Cruz and San Simeon is so rugged and breathtaking that it takes you all day just so you can stop and catch your breath at all the phenomenal scenery. Stopping at Ventana or big Sur is always recommended but the jewel is the coastline itself. I never tire of it. It is not for the weak of heart with all the hairpin turns but the views are so worth it on a clear day. The sun sending sparkling diamonds over the water and the multitude shades of blue in the sea overcome the senses. Just keep your eyes on the road and pull off to really look at the views as they are what makes it all so worthwhile.
I stayed in Cambria on Moonstone beach, and took my camera down to the rocks setting up to take shots of the opera of colors that would sing with the sun setting. There I met a fellow photographer who was already set up and we talked until the sunset made us silent with its amazing chorus as we snapped picture after picture, both knowing we would never capture all of its beauty. He was an older fellow that had been widowed a few years earlier and was going up to San Francisco to visit his son. He and I shared a wonderful meal at the Sow's Ear which was his favorite in town when he passed through. Again another place I would not have found. I also took myself on a tour of Heast Castle and ended up sitting with a family on the bus up the hill. I couldn't place the face of the father but I knew I had seen him before. His wife and two daughters and I had a great time on the tour and I kept trying to place him. Finally I gave up and and asked him where I knew him from. His daughter who I had spent the last three hours with started to laugh, and gave him a bad time.
"Daddy! Doesn't know you! Your beard worked!"
His wife told me he was Greg Morris from Mission Impossible fame. I hated to admit that I did watch the show but it had been a while and didn't recognise him. We had lunch together and no one knew that a celebrity was amoung them. He loved it.
I spent the next couple of nights with friends in Morro Bay and enjoying watching them wrangle around each other because I was there. She never did like it when I visited. But Matt is like a brother to me and well, wives come and go it seems, at least she did.
Then I stayed one night in Santa Barbara and for all the hype, I guess I didn't find the real thing. I explored State Street, went down on the pier and ate some great food, but I found most everyone to be a bit too into themselves. I didn't like it much.
Last of all I took myself to Disneyland. I spent the day riding on the rides I remembered from my youth, that I had taken my daughter on when she was little and watching all the parents and the children enjoy what I so loved as a child. Some people looked at me strangely as I rode by myself or sat next to someone else's child that did not have a parent or friend. But most accepted that I was there having a good time being a child again.
I learned that I could go anywhere and not feel embarassed to be alone. That I was not a loser becuase I liked my own company. I met some very interesting people that I would not have met had I been in the cocoon of friends and family. I learned how to rely on myself to make my trip a sucess, and not worry that I had to be on time for someone else's schedule. Most of all I really had time to think about things or not. My choice. Something we forget about sometimes in our daily life.
I have taken many trips alone since that first one. I have really loved each of them. We learn more about ourselves when we take chances and step out of our everyday roles. I like that I am not afraid to go alone and do the things I love to do. But I love it most when I can share it with my friends and family because they want to be adventurous and learn something new and see all that there is out there to see.
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